Today is Friday.  It’s trash day.  I think I got in trouble for forgetting to put it out last night.  I didn’t forget.  I just didn’t think about it.  You see, we got home late from a crappy dinner, and I went upstairs to lie on the couch and watch some TV.  Sure, why not?
Food Net

Photo Credit: Food52

                           

In any event, I thought I heard words coming from the kitchen.  She only said them once, so I figured, they weren’t important.  So silly.  Everything is important.  Part of the problem is I’m going deaf.  I haven’t been clinically diagnosed, but it’s happening. I think.  On top of that, the TV was way too loud.  (I’m going deaf, remember.)  Minutes later, I heard the trash cans being dragged.  That’s when I pieced together the words that might have been coming from the kitchen.  Something to the effect of “….the trash…. needs to be taken…. out.”  I don’t know.  Maybe it’s the neighbors.

The cans only need to go like 5 feet, but I knew they were a “temper altering” 5 feet.  Either way, I was delinquent in my duties.  I decided to check out the Garage Cam on the phone.  By then, all I saw was the garage door closing.  It was too late to pretend to be helpful, so I figured it would be wiser to get ready for “The Showdown.”

“There were maggots ALL OVER THE PLACE!”  Ha, an indirect attack. I figured I probably shouldn’t respond with “What do you want me to do about that?”  Instead, I opted for “Really! That’s crazy.  They  weren’t there last week.”  Here’s the thing, the tone was more of a “Hey jerk, I had to take out the trash myself AND THERE WERE MAGGOTS.  I do everything… yada, yada, yada.”  I might have misunderstood.  I don’t know where maggots come from, nor do I know how they got there.  It didn’t matter.  ” I guess we can try to produce less trash.”  My plan was to say very little and be thankful that the maggots took the brunt of the heat for me.

Here’s the thing, I don’t know why we got maggots this week and not last.  My guess is it’s all that wonderfully fresh and organic food we have been eating.  I wanted to help solve the problem, but I didn’t think it was time to play man and “solve problems.”  I figured it was more of a “don’t say too much and just listen.”  Maggots happen.  Some times they show up, other times. They don’t.  So I’d like to thank the maggots for taking one for the team.

Onto the Fruit flies.  We have a lot of fruit flies.  I mean a lot!  So many that they fly into our neighbor’s condo.  We were at her house once and asked if we get a lot of fruit flies.  I was just as upset (and embarrassed.)  Yeah, I don’t know where they are coming from.

Fruit flies are a pain in the ass and seem impossible to get rid.  I proposed a fly strip, but those are toxic.  We can’t have toxic shit around the house, not like the tons of other plastic toxins in the house.

We now have a cute food covering thing.  You know, the kind that you find on Pinterest, then buy on Etsy.  Yeah, you know the one (target audience.)

Here’s what I don’t understand. On the one hand, I no longer have fruit flies hovering around my face; on the other hand, they seem to be trapped under the net, where the food is. I’m not sure it’s supposed to work that way, but good for those guys. Are fruit flies bad for your food?

My first inclination is to try and solve these problems.  Instead, I decided to embrace all these perceived shortcomings as part of the bounty that is eating nature’s bounty as provided by the lovely farmer’s market.

Have a great weekend.

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